Meet Erica
Group Coaching Program
Transformation Story
"In [the course], the whole idea of the body just leaves you, because it's really about feeling good inside."
"I'm a mentor and I help a number of women...people need me, and I was thriving on that."
BEFORE
Erica was being pulled in all directions, rarely getting support for herself and giving it all to others.
DURING
She realized she was giving to others so she could feel worth inside; throughout the course, she began to give herself her own worthiness.
AFTER
Erica feels a way she's never felt before. She's finding joy in her daily journey, finding that she's her own best friend.
Giving Energy to Others
When you first meet Erica White, you get an instant surge of positive energy. You get that because Erica’s been giving of herself all of her life: she fills others’ cups through mentorship, friendship, and relationships. She admits that her life has been one of self-doubt, and quite naturally, a result is that she gives so much energy to others instead of to herself.
“I like to talk negatively to myself and beat myself up, and at the same time, my brain is a fixer for other people’s problems.”
In the Spring, when recognizing an exhaustion from this natural affinity of hers to give to others, she felt she was DONE. Quite literally, she had burned herself into exhaustion. She was so drained; she was too tired to start anything new, even if it was a new thing that focused solely on her. She’d stop creating art, she stopped her hobbies...she had little motivation for any of her usual activities. She said,
“It was difficult to commit to anything, because I didn’t realize how exhausted I was from running my life into the ground.”
As Julie began the Program in June 2020, she became the mentor that Erica never expected. Erica joined for vanity reasons, she’ll admit that. She signed up for the class because of “Julie’s body.” No joke, Julie’s history of bikini competitions was enough of a selling point. But through the program, “the whole idea of the body just leaves you…” Erica didn’t expect that she’d be doing an “inside job". She found that change happened when she dug deep and did the hard work around “feeling good inside,” work she’d needed to do for a long time.
In the weekly meetings of both lessons from Julie and sharing from her other classmates, Erica found that she was again self-criticizing. She’d encourage the other women in the group to share their experiences and their struggles, but when it came to herself, she pushed those feelings deep down.
An Artist First and Foremost
Erica is primarily a painter. She creates large-scale abstract pieces using her hands like paintbrushes. She hadn’t painted in a long while, but the openness of the program encouraged her to dip her toe back into the artistic waters so to speak. She bought a 4 feet by 7 feet large canvas and knew she’d get to it someday. This was a big step for her, and it happened shortly before week 10.
After a meditation near the end of the program, she’d reached a pivotal point with herself. This was the first meditation she could remember - in both the program and in programs before - having complete internal stillness. It was a rare feeling for Erica. She couldn’t recall feeling so at peace. She felt like she was "catapulted into that divine moment."
In Her Own Words
Erica shares her story.
Erica shares...
What happens when you start to see yourself differently when you look in the mirror.
The Artist's Process
The Words
Sealed and Replaced with Beauty
"Catapulted into that divine moment."
When the meditation was over, with a calming energy overwhelming her, Erica took out the canvas she’d just bought. In black chalk, she began writing on the canvas all the insults she’d said to herself. She wrote out each of those things she’d recited to herself - things around body image, insecurity, neediness. These were daily insults she’s recited almost prayerfully.
Then, once all the insults were down on the canvas, she paused. She looked over the words and was inspired to wrote over them with uplifting and empowering words that were coming through her as she continued writing. As if struck by the divine, Erica decided something so profound it brought her chills. She decided to leave all the words on the canvas and to paint over them. She began painting her first piece since beginning the program. She’d taken those negative words and written them on the page, getting them out of her head. And she sealed them onto the canvas, vowing her hardest to not let them seep back into her mind. She then painted over them with a beautiful wash of color.
The Joy is in The Journey
Today, Erica remarks that her self growth is not a race to a finish line, but instead, it’s a journey. Each moment, each exercise in self-love along the way, and each positive affirmation is making that journey a little bit easier for Erica. Just a few days before we interviewed her on her experience in the course, she said she experienced different self-talk when looking in the mirror.
"What I told myself in the mirror that day was completely different than what I had always been telling myself...I was like, Oh, you look good. You know, just that shift, of it not being the number of pounds, per se, but just a more loving
relationship with myself."
Erica will say that she’ll happily continue her journey with Julie at her side, growing each and everyday in her own self-worth and love.
Ready to feel good from the inside out?
Sign up for the next round of Body Freedom Connection!
It's About Time Baby! © 2020